How to Choose Joy On Terrible, Horrible, No Good, Very Bad Days

Anyone else used to be obsessed with that book growing up? I would make my Mom read it to me over and over and over again. I just loved Alexander's super red hair and freckles!!...Maybe that explains why I've always wanted a little kid with bright red hair...ha, I can't believe I'd never considered that!

Okay, I digress. But fo realz. Whether you know that book or not, if you've been on the planet for more than a minute, chances are, you've had a terrible, horrible, no good, very bad day.

You know the one. Where everything just seems to be against you. You spill your coffee in the morning, rip your favorite shirt, miss the train, send an email to the wrong person, get yelled at by your boss, burn dinner and when you go to sit down to watch this week's episode of the Bachelor, realize you've forgotten to DVR it. Or maybe you are just feeling a general lack of faith in humanity with the going ons of the world lately. And chances are, if you're anything like me. you've spend the whoooole day listening to Adele (#bestsadmusicever) and complaining to your friends about your shitty, shitty, day.

Sound familiar?

I used to have more days like this than I'd like to admit. I would sit and sulk in my frustration. And let me tell ya, I was not fun to be around. 

I've been reading The Universe Has Your Back (a really fantastic book all about fear)  and something she emphasizes is how the energy you intentionally put out into the world directly affects your mindset. In other words, how you FEEL every single day is entirely up to you.

This is a concept I used to have a really hard time grasping -- I mean, I just couldn't get it... 
What if someone was being rude to me? Or traffic was THE WORST and it took me an extra 30 minutes to get home.  Or what if I had a terrible, horrible, no good, very bad day like the one I just shared? Those things would obviously make an impact on how my day went... I would CLEARLY feel frustrated, upset, irritated and annoyed if any of those things happened to me, right?

Well, that's what I used to think.

But here's what I've been learning, and what I want to empower you to consider:

You are 100% made up of the decisions you make.


Sure, you can't control the things that you'll come up against throughout your day, but you CAN control how you respond to them. You can choose to lean towards JOY instead of fear, doubt or frustration.

"Your decision leads you to experience joy in a seemingly joyless situation" - Gabby Bernstein


Let me're thinking "ok, ok, it SOUNDS easy and all, but how do you actually put it into practice?" You know I wasn't gonna leave you hanging like that. I gotchu, girl ;) 

So here are 3 of my favorite tools on how to CHOOSE JOY on even the worst of days:

+ Focus on how you WANT to feel and get clear on your VALUES

If I were to ask you the question: "How do you want to feel every single day?", what would you say? For example, I would say: Joy-filled, ease, connected, grounded, free and strong.

And further, what are the things that you do/have done that help you feel these things? For example, some of the things that I do to connect to these feelings are: throwing myself a dance party, getting a workout in, calling my mom, practice yoga, meditate, journal, play with my pup , share my story in a blog post, have a work date at a coffee shop, snuggle with my hubby etc.

Brainstorm and journal it out and see what you come up with!

+ Recite an affirmation that is in line with your values

I know this may sound hokey (and trust me, until recently, I thought all of this was a load of bullshit), but I've been incorporating affirmations into my morning rituals for the past month and it has been a GAME CHANGER. 

My current favorite go-to is from a book called the Big leap (check it out!): 

“I expand in abundance, success and love every day as I inspire others to do the same.”

Before I start my day, I spend 5 minutes saying this out loud and breathing it in. This hasn't been something that has come easy to me. I've been SUPER resistant to any form of affirmation for years, but I dedicated this year as the year of GROWTH and part of that means being open to new experiences. So I said F*ck it. Let's try it. And man oh man has it been a game changer. That sense of ease I've been craving? I'm finally starting to see it show up in my life and I'm loving every second of it.

So whether this affirmation resonates with you, or another one jumps out at you, choose one and commit to starting your day by saying it every day next week! Need some examples of mantras? Click here!

+Shock your system

You ready for it? This is how to put all of the things you've discovered in the last two points and jolt yourself into joy.

I want you to spend the next week getting curious with yourself. On days when you're feeling any negative emotion, allow yourself to feel the feels if you need to for a few minutes ('cause sometimes that shit is necessary), and then SHIFT YOUR SPIRIT. You know that list I had you write up? The one of all the things that help you feel the way you want to? Pick one and DO IT. Jolt yourself into a better day and decide to freaking CHOOSE JOY. Ok?

You are more POWERFUL and CAPABLE than you realize, beautiful girl. And you deserve to feel all the light & love the world has to offer. Let's start creating it together, ok?

Xo Amanda

p.s. I'd love to hear your thoughts and how you found this exercise! Comment below or contact me if you wanna chat more about this :)