Living Your F*ck YES Life

28 Lessons from 28 years of life

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It’s pretty incredible to look back to see how far you’ve come.

This is my 2nd time doing this since I started the blog (check out last years roundup here) and every year I’m blown away by all the things I’ve taken away.

I spent so many years of my life on automatic pilot, going through the motions and not taking stock in my life. What I was learning, how I was growing. And doing this every year has been such an amazing way to look back and do just that — plus you guys know I LOVE sharing my shiz with you.

So here they are — the mess, the growth, the shifts. I hope they serve as a gorgeous reminder for your own life.


28 lessons from 28 years of life:

  1. Success isn’t about the shiny pennies. It’s about getting clear on what’s truly important to you and going after that feeling every day.

  2. Boundaries are beautiful. When you set them, you are finally able to say no to things you don’t want so you can say yes to the things you do.

  3. The thing that feels like the hardest thing on the planet to do/decide/shift? It’s not. It might suck, and be painful but you’ll get through it.

  4. Anxiety is your intuition giving you clues. This was a huge lesson this year (and therapy) has taught me and it’s allowed me to truly learn how to use it as my superpower instead of feeling overwhelmed by it. 

  5. Run towards the people and experiences that fill your cup.

  6. Trust the gut tugs. This was one of the lessons I didn’t expect to learn and one that has changed so much about the way I navigate life. 

  7. A woman’s body is SO complex and something to be celebrated — periods and all. (Read more about my switch from birth control pills to the copper IUD this year

  8. Vulnerability is strength. Embrace the mess and choose to grow from it.

  9. 20 minute workouts can be just as empowering and challenging as an hour boot camp class. Choosing my time wisely in this way has been such a huge part of my journey this year and my old limiting beliefs that left me in the gym for hours always feeling not enough has been BLASTED on a whole new level with the workout program I’m currently rocking. 

  10. Put yourself first and foremost. Over EVERYTHING. Because you cannot give to anyone or anything if your tank isn’t full first.

  11. That I am a manifesting generator in human design and a 7 on the enneagram (which gave me SOOO much understanding about myself and why I operate the way I do — check out episode 5 of the podcast for more info!)

  12. My boobs do not define me as a woman or a sexual being. Period.

  13. Belief is the root of every possibility we allow into our lives. 

  14. Money doesn’t have to be stressful. We don’t HAVE to live paycheck to paycheck and constantly perpetuate the “I’m broke” cycle and it STARTS with the words we say and the energy we put into the universe. 

  15. Allll about my innate privilege and how I can show up in the self development space AND be an advocate for social change.

  16. Expectations can’t get met if you don’t express them. Ask for what you want. Express what you need. 

  17. Surround yourself with people who have different perspectives and lives than yours. It is the most beautiful way to grow and learn. Don’t know where to start? Follow people online and diversify your feed.

  18. Sharing your story, even when you’re going through the damn thing, can be the most rewarding thing you ever do.

  19. If you don’t like it, change it. You have the power to shift your thoughts/decisions/the way you show up in the world. So do the damn thing and make the shift. Even if it’s hard. 

  20. Change isn’t such a bad thing. I used to be terrified of change but this year has taught me so much about the beauty of leaning into the shifts. Change may be uncomfortable but that discomfort? It’s where all the growth and magic takes place, if you let it.

  21. My heart craves adventure. I need it. I thrive off of it. And the more adventure I can have in my life, the more my soul feels filled the fuck up. So move towards what lights you up. 

  22. Just because something works for one person doesn’t mean it’s going to work for you. You already have the answers inside of you. Surround yourself with people who help you get clear on what you really want instead of those who prescribe what they do to you. 

  23. Starting your day off with gratitude will change the game. I’ve been doing this for the past 6 months and it truly puts my mindset in the best spot. 

  24. Peoples beliefs don’t pay the bills. Do what sets your soul on fire and do so apologetically. Not everyone will get it. But don’t let other peoples thoughts stop you from showing up for what YOU want on YOUR terms.

  25. Community is EVERYTHING. Women are hardwired for community and it MF SUCKS when we don’t feel like we have people in our lives who truly get us. Whether you foster and create your own soul sisterhood like I did or join one (you can sit with us!), seek out a group of women that will set your soul on fire and empower you to be better every single day.

  26. Be an advocate for your health. One of my biggest takeaways from my BRCA journey this year has been standing up for what I want with my doctors. Ask for what you want. Trust your intuition. And don’t just follow doctors orders because they tell you it’s what’s you have to do. Get second, third and fourth opinions. Do your research. Talk to people who’ve been in your shoes. And stand up for your health, it’s all you’ve got.

  27. “What do you need today love?” — a beautiful tool my dear friend Jen Wille shared on episode 21 of the podcast and one that has truly helped me get super acquainted with my innate desires.

  28. The key to living your fuck yes life? Getting rid of the “shoulds” and getting clear on what lights you up and moving ALLLLL THE WAY in that direction. Okay? Ok. 


Which ones are you committed to working on this year?

Xo Amanda

Why I decided to get a Preventative Double Mastectomy at the age of 27

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I've always known that whatever hardship came my way I could handle.

I'm strong willed and a hell of a fighter.

When I was 8, at overnight camp, I was bullied and literally thrown rocks at by the other girls in my cabin. 

When I was 10, I suddenly woke up in the middle of the night and unexpectedly couldn't walk and ended up in the hospital for 4 days with the doctors unable to diagnose what was wrong with me. 

I’ve struggled with body image, toxic friendships, losing friendships, orthorexia, the yo yo dieting binge cycle, anxiety, panic attacks, the works, and with self development and the right tools, I’ve overcome them.

But some things you just don’t feel like you can…

When I found out I was positive for the BRCA 1 gene earlier this year, I tried so hard to not let it derail me and have a total breakdown — to be “strong”. But the day I found out, I couldn’t keep it together. I ran to the shower and had a totally hot ass mess breakdown, movie style.

And it’s crazy to think that in 2 weeks, on December 3rd 2018, I’m going to have the official “previvor” status.

Yup, I’m chopping off my tits.

The decision to get a preventative double mastectomy was easy. I knew going into my genetic testing that if I found out I was #brca1 I would be going through with the surgery. (I didn’t WANT to, but I knew that’s what I would want to do given the circumstances.)

I could have gone the preventative screening route — which is a totally valid option! — but I know myself and I knew that I would constantly be living in fear.

Getting tested on the other hand? I put it off for years out of fear. But if there’s one thing I hope my journey with all of this shared is that knowing your predispositions is what gives you AGENCY over your HEALTH and your LIFE.

I’m grateful I know because now, I get to MAKE a choice. I get to stand up to cancer and tell it to fuck right off.

And that is a powerful thing.

Maybe you have a history of breast or ovarian cancer in your family and you can relate. Or maybe you are navigating your journey with a genetic mutation too. Or maybe, you are waiting to do something you know you need to do out of FEAR.

I’m here to tell you you’re not alone, my love. And that if you need ANYTHING, I’m always just a message away.

If you want to learn more about BRCA and my journey with it,

take a listen to this episode of the podcast.

 

I’ll be blogging more about my recovery journey and everything in between so if we’re not email penpals, be sure to subscribe to my email list to not miss a beat.

Your love & support means the world.

Let’s kick this BRCA gene in the goddamn tits.

Xo Amanda  

Living with Anxiety? Yeah, me too.

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Anxiety.

The word alone gives me anxiety — and honestly, I’ve been wanting to write a post about this for a long ass time but something has kept holding me back…until today.


Why now?

If you follow me on Instagram, you know that I love to pop into my Insta stories on the regular and talk to you guys — pep talks, rants, goofy moments, adorable pup time with Toby and silly dance parties are what you normally can expect, but last week, I was having one of those days (maybe you know the kind) and I brought it up on my stories, asking for help on how to navigate it all.

And I’ve never had SO MUCH response to something I posted in my life. 92% of my followers said they struggled with anxiety too. I knew I wasn’t alone but the amount of “me too” responses I got absolutely blew me away and I knew I couldn’t stay silent about it anymore.


My Story

I've lived with anxiety for the past 5 years. The summer of 2013, an event in my life triggered what I now know to be called a panic attack. At the time, I thought I was literally dying. I was hyperventilating and crying so much that I almost passed out and for the life of me, I couldn’t make it stop.

This was my first experience with anxiety, or at least what I can remember.

And honestly, my first experience with mental health struggles.

My anxiety took a really intense hold over my life for the years following — panic attacks would happen when I least expected, conversations about the simplest things could spur it and I would find myself waking up with a heavy chest that just couldn’t go away, no matter what I did.

I’ve spent the past 5 years navigating my anxiety and building up tools in my tool box that have helped immensely — and what used to be a super common feeling has turned into something that rears its head every one and a while.

Anxiety looks different on everyone. I know women who navigate it from all ends of the spectrum — from women who have Generalized Anxiety Disorder (GAD) who are on medication for their anxiety to women who occasionally get anxious about specific circumstances in their lives.

One thing I do know? Most women don’t talk about it.

Which makes us all feel a hell of a lot more alone in all of it, don’t ya think?

It’s my mission to help contribute to the mission to normalize anxiety — ‘cause you are not less than because you experience it, in any capacity. Ya hear me?


What you can do?

I was blown away by the incredible thoughtful response some of my amazing followers on Instagram shared with me, and I wanted to share their thoughts alongside mine. Here they are…

“Breathing mantras and writing!”

“Puppy snuggles” — you laugh but there is scientific proof that petting pups actually lowers your cortisol (aka stress) levels!

“Journaling out my feelings”

“Evening out my breath. So making my inhales 5ish secs and my exhales 5ish secs.”

“Yoga, meditation and journaling is what works for me.”

“Getting enough sleep”

“Painting/being creative in any way.”

“Reading.”

“Big hugs”

“Writing down things I can see, feel. and hear helps ground me.”

“Reminding myself of things that are true.”

“Running and coloring”


How thoughtful are these responses? So many incredible things to sift through and find what works for you.


Here are some of my personal go-tos that have been a total godsend to quiet or rid myself of anxiety:


EXERCISE PAIRED WITH SUPPORT

The minute I feel anxiety creeping up, I know that the best thing I can do is to sweat it out. It works absolute WONDERS, and having a community of women encouraging me and supporting me along the way has been KEY in my journey. We all need spaces that allow us to come exactly as we are and that’s what these groups have been for me.


THROW MYSELF A DANCE PARTY

There is nothing like putting on some of my favorite tunes (lately I’ve been taking it back to some TLC and it’s been pretty fucking incredible) and throwing myself a major dance party.

I know it can feel counter-intuitive in the moment but thrusting your body into something active and physical and unexpected can help jolt you out of your state of anxiety.


GO FOR A WALK

Sometimes something as simple as a shift in environment and getting outside can make all the difference. I actually try to pre-emptively plan for these with my daily mid day walk with my pup — it forces me to get out of the house! If you work a traditional full time gig, take your lunch outside or take the second half of it by going for a walk. Better yet, start your day with a quick walk around the block to wake you up!

REMEMBER — if you are struggling and need someone to talk to, I’m always just a message away my love. I’m no expert on anxiety but I’m always, always here.

Xo Amanda

p.s. I’m hosting an End Overeating & Anxiety for good webinar with my good friend and therapist Rachel Wright later this month and would love to see you there — be sure to hop on my email list and in our Live Your F*ck Yes Life Facebook community to get the deets first!

Facing Fear Head On: A 20 somethings journey of being BRCA positive

FEAR.

For so much of my life, I let fear steer the wheel. 

 

I quit ballet after my first class because 3 girls made fun of me and I was scared nobody would be my friend.

I didn't ask the boy out because I was terrified he'd reject me and not think I was pretty enough.

I dieted and dieted in fear that I wouldn't be cast in shows because I wouldn't be "skinny enough".

Can you relate? 

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The past 2 years of my life, I've been on an intense journey of self discovery and a huge part of that was facing fear head on.

 

I faced it head on when I broke the diet cycle once and for all, and healed my relationship with food and fitness.

I faced it head on when I decided to pay everything I've learned forward and become a health coach and join a tribe of incredible women changing the freaking world

I faced it head on when I took a good hard look at my debt, made a plan and in less than a year, paid off all my credit card debt. 

I faced it head on when I went shirtless on stage for the first time in my life and faced all the body love demons that had been a part of my life for so damn long. 

 

And heading into this year, I knew that it was time to face a fear I've been living with for a very long time. 

 

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MY STORY 

When my dad was 18, his mum died of breast cancer at the age of 44. 

And growing up, I've seen how that loss took such a toll on him. I mean, losing a parent at all let alone at 18 years old is awful -- and something that I'm so grateful to say I've not had to go through myself. Because goddamn, my parents are my best friends and that's something even just thinking about breaks my fucking heart.

And all my life, I've had this little fear living at the back of my mind that I would have the same fate as my grandma. Call it intuition, call it gut, call it fear, it was super present in my world since I was old enough to understand it.

And that fear came to an all time high during my Sophomore year of college when my Dad got tested for the BRCA gene mutations (more info on all of this and real time reactions on episode 6 of the Live Your F*ck Yes Life Podcast) and found out that he was a carrier of the gene (and the only one of his siblings who is).

At the time, I didn't fully understand what that meant,  beyond the fact that I had a 50/50 chance of getting it, and honestly fear took over every ounce of me that I didn't want to know. I was 20 and the way I felt at the time was that knowing would just make it harder.

So I decided not to find out...until this year.

And you know what? Looking back, I'm grateful I waited.

Grateful because at the time, I was going through SO much internally that I think the information I knew deep down was true -- the fact that I also am BRCA 1 positive -- would have broken me in half.

Now, I'm 27, and while I'm still so young, I've lived a lot of life.

Hell, in the last 4 years alone, I've dealt with a binge eating disorder, orthorexia, planned a wedding, dealt with sudden onset anxiety, bought our first house, started my business, moved out of said home and lived in hotels for 6 months because of water damage, navigated job shifts and health issues with my hubby, started a podcast and beyond. 

And that's not counting all the odd jobs, shows, teaching gigs, travels, mentoring and everything else in my life. 

And while so much of it has been incredibly fulfilling and invigorating, a lot of my life has been filled with obstacle after obstacle -- as I'm sure yours has been too, because hey, that's what being a freaking human being is all about, right?

And while, at the time, those obstacles have felt INSURMOUNTABLE, here I am (and here you are) on the other side of it all, STRONGER for it and more self aware than ever. 

And I sit here, grateful for it all, because it gave me the courage to stop waiting.

To show up as a warrior in my life and put the worries to rest.

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So yes, I am a woman living with the BRCA 1 gene.

I don't have cancer, yet. But the chance of me getting breast or ovarian cancer is high AF.

And while that in and of itself scares the SHIT out of me, I've never felt more empowered. Because I get to do something about it.

I don't know what that is yet, but you know I'll be sharing it all along the way, mess and all, 'cause that's how I freaking roll. 

And I'm so goddamn grateful to have you along for the ride.

Xo Amanda 

 

p.s. if you aren't in our Live Your F*ck Yes Life Community, come on over and join the convo. We're all in this together babe.

The One Thing You Need To Start Your Year Right

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Are you a big fan on new years resolutions?

I used to make them every single year, and every year I would inevitably break them and my type A perfectionist nature would feel like an utter failure.

"Go to the gym 5x a week." FAILURE.

"Go vegan." Ha, that one lasted a month.

"Practice yoga 3x a week." Nope.

Sound familiar?

And it got me thinking -- why do we start our years out making a resolution that is clearly well intentioned but will inevitably not be able to fully commit to (and often forget about 2 weeks later)?

There has to be a better way to be INTENTIONAL with our upcoming year -- and that's why I started a NEW TRADITION heading into this last year that really stuck with me and helped build POSITIVE momentum.

 

What's this you say, Amanda? 

Hush, hush, I'll tell you.

 

CHOOSE YOUR WORD OF THE YEAR.

 

I went into 2017 with the word GROWTH.

I started my business at the very end of 2015 and the first year of ANY new adventure is a freaking rollercoaster and filled with ALL the kinks. 

I was failing forward like crazy and had definitely started to build a foundation for my business but I had (and have) some seriously HUGE goals and I knew that the only way I would be able to achieve them was with MASSIVE GROWTH.

What I didn't realize was just how much of that growth needed to be INTERNAL instead of EXTERNAL.

I don't know about you but when I hear the word growth, I think numbers and a higher income. And while that certainly did happen this year, the external growth ONLY happened AFTER I had done a shit ton of work on my INNER GROWTH.

What areas did this include?

  • Inner work on my positive self talk
  • Serious work on my money mindset (*cough* scarcity mindset)
  • Belief in myself as a leader
  • Working "as if" I was was already where I wanted to be. 
  • Developing a routine and a work ethic that was IN LINE with my goals. It turns out that big dreams without action are just DREAMS. 
  • Allowing myself to DREAM BIG and crash into the fear instead of allowing it to paralyze me. 

...and so much more. 

2017 was certainly a year of massive growth for me and my team.

And because of all of the self development I did as a PERSON, and all the work I did on building up my MINDSET and BELIEF SYSTEMS, I was able to grow my team into a group of 100+ women who also want to turn their passion for health & fitness into a business or side hustle, help over 200 women BUST THROUGH THEIR EMOTIONAL EATING & ditch the yo yo dieting once and for all within my Live Your F*ck YES Life Challenges and financially, I was able to pay off ALL of our credit card debt, and start to really contribute to our family.


So as we head into 2018, I've been thinking a lot about what I want my word of the year to be. And through the prompts I will share with you shortly, I decided on

UNAPOLOGETIC

So often, we (myself included) apologize for the way we are and the things that light us up.

And I realized this year that I've been doing that way more frequently than I realized -- and enough is enough.

I'm CLAIMING MY TRUTH and officially going BALLS TO THE WALL with who I am, what I believe in and what is important to me and I'm refusing to hold myself back.

If that means I lose a few followers on social media because I'm too much of a crazy goofball baby grandma who swears and talks about poop, so be it.

No more dimming my light because I'm afraid people won't like me.

This gal is officially going to show up every day UNAPOLOGETICALLY HERSELF. So gear up.

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Now, how does one even start figuring out what their word of the year might be?

I'm glad you asked!

 

Here's a combination of exercises to help you discover yours:

1. Grab a journal and allow yourself to free write -- close your eyes and think about your DREAM day. What are you doing? Who are you with? How do you feel? Got it in your head? Write down everything you're experiencing on a piece of paper.

2. Think about your upcoming year. What do you know for sure will be happening in 2018? What do you want to manifest for your year? What are some things that could happen that would LIGHT YOU UP INSIDE? 

3. Look over the words you wrote in the last 2 steps. Did any feelings resonate throughout? Any particular words get written more than once? Bonus? Check out this list of words (inspired by the lovely Susannah Conway) and see which ones pop out to you most! Circle the 5 ones that really resonate with you.

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4. From the words you circled, I want you to spend some time journaling out what each of them represents to you and WHY feeling that way would make you feel your BEST in 2018. What does it represent to you? Why is that important?

 

You'll likely find yourself gravitating towards one or two words that really hit home for you. 

And from there -- the way to officially choose your word is to answer one simple question: WHICH ONE LIGHTS ME UP THE MOST?

 

That's your word of the year.

 

I would LOVE to hear which word you came up with!

Share in the comments below (or in our Facebook community!) so I can support you heading into the new year!

Xo Amanda 

 

 

 

 

 

 

How to Set Yourself Up For Your Best Year Ever

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Do you find yourself making BIG ASS GOALS that sound really freaking good...
but end up at the end of the year with nothing having changed and the same “hopes” and “dreams” heading into the next year?

One of my most eye-opening takeaways from my leadership retreat this fall was the realization that the first half of the year, I was living in maintenance mode.

MAINTENANCE MODE? DA FUCK?

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As a coach, I spend so much of my time preaching and teaching how to bust through your comfort zones but here I've been, holding myself back along the way. 

And, as a result, a few months ago, I found myself in a self-induced plateau with my own fitness, business, and personal growth.

The past few months, I’ve been journaling, surrounding myself with high vibe women that have helped me work through some major roadblocks and gave me some serious aha realizations...
 

The truth?
I've been hiding.
 

I have let self doubt and fear run my life.
I've been waiting for all my big goals and dreams to just go *POOF* and happen.

But you know what? I'm the only one who can make them happen.

The only one who can start believing in myself.
The only one who can step up and make a change.

The only one who can bust through this comfy warm and fuzzy zone I’m in and SHOW THE FUCK UP for my business and my life the way I KNOW I am capable of.


 

So, for the rest of 2017 I'm committing to ME.
I'm committing to my dreams.

I'm committing to working as hard as I can so Kevan and I can build the life we want and set a foundation for our future family and lives.

I'm committing to sharing my message because I know that someone, somewhere needs to hear it, just the way I needed it when I was starting MY journey.

I'm committing to early mornings with my community so I can pour into my own cup so that I have enough left over to pour into others.

I'm committing to getting fierce AF with my goals and following through no matter what.

I’m committing to being the best leader I can be for the amazing women on my team, because my success inspires their success.

 

 

Are you ready to commit to YOU, too? 

Time to stop sitting on the sidelines of your own freaking life, girlfriend.


 

HERE ARE SOME JOURNALING PROMPTS TO GET YOU STARTED... 

What would that look like?

What would you have to give up or release?

What changes would you have to make in your daily routine?

What mindset shifts would you need to make?

 

Today is the beginning of the rest of your life and YOU get to write the script -- what do you want it to say?

If you need some support, you know I'm always here for ya :)

Xo Amanda

Love letters to my former selves

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If you could go back in time and speak to your former self, would you?

I would. And I would have SO much to tell her.

 

I had an amazing childhood. I've had a pretty awesome life, all things considered.

From the outside, life can often look pretty picture perfect.

Hell, as a recovering perfectionist, I MADE it appear that way for YEARS. 

As so many of us do.

But what you so often don't see are the struggles and hardships others face -- because let's be honest, EVERYONE goes through something hard. Period.

If you don't, you're a robot and this post isn't for you.

Growing up, I WAS happy. I had an amazing family, wonderful friends and I was constantly doing things that lit me up: choir practice, rehearsing for shows, soccer, volleyball, planning volunteer events to raise money for charities, working my butt off to do well in school -- I was the epitome of the perfect daughter/student/friend/you name it.

But what most people didn't see was the stuff I hid behind closed doors.

The bullying. The body shaming. The emotional eating. The dieting. 

Dear 8 year old Amanda:

It doesn’t matter what those girls in your ballet class say or think. “You don’t belong here”, she said. Those words. They impact you in ways you never imagined. And while you may have stopped dancing for 10 years because of it, guess what? You freaking DANCE now. It may have taken time, and a whole lot of coaxing on behalf of your friends, but you belong anywhere you decide to belong. Period. The only person that decides your path is YOU.

 

Dear 10 year old Amanda:

Yelling at Mom about how nothing fits in the dressing room at the Hudson’s Bay Company isn’t going to make you feel better. She’s trying to help, because she LOVES you. And hates to watch you tear your body apart with your words. You may not be skinny like that popular girl in your class, but that doesn’t mean you’re not beautiful just the way you are.

 

Dear 13 year old Amanda:

I know you’re hurting. I know you don’t understand how anyone could be so awful as to literally throw rocks at you and call you ugly. I know you feel alone and scared but this? This will make you stronger. This will allow you to resonate with other women who have also been bullied and will open your heart up to a beautiful vulnerability that helps OTHER women heal. And THAT is a beautiful and powerful thing.

 

Dear 19 year old Amanda:

Hearing the words “you’re as big as a mac truck” from someone who supposedly loved you isn’t easy. And I know you can’t recognize it now, but this will be the thing that triggers your negative relationship with food and binge eating habits. YOUR WORTH is not dictated by another person's opinion of you. Your sadness will not be solved by an entire pint of Ben & Jerry’s ice cream. And those words? They don’t define you -- all they do is shed a little insight into the BS world that person is projecting onto you.

 

Dear 21 year old Amanda:

This is the year it hits you. The year you realize that you actually look the way you never thought you would. You've somehow gained 30 lbs in 2 years without realizing -- what apparently happens when you're in college and have a disordered relationship with food -- and when you see that picture from your trip to Greece, you break down and cry. I know you're feeling helpless right now but this is the beginning of you finding your LIGHT, and while it may not be an easy road the next few years, it's going to make you stronger and have the experience to help so many women find a consistent, balanced and JOY-filled relationship with exercise and food. 
 

Dear 23 year old Amanda:

Working out 2 times a day and eating only brussel sprouts for dinner is not sustainable. You’re going to finally lose the weight you’ve been telling yourself you needed to lose to be happy. Actually, you’re going to get so skinny that your friends start telling you they’re concerned, but you just don’t see it. But you know what? Over-exercising and existing on bird food and cleanses?  It’s not going to make you feel GOOD. It’s only going to exacerbate your emotional eating, negative self talk and mental health. Only when you are FUELING yourself from the inside out and using fitness as a way to feel STRONG will you find your groove and feel ALIVE and CONFIDENT in your own skin.

Dear 24 year old Amanda:

I know this year has been CRAZY for you. You’ve been prepping for a wedding, bought your first home, and spend your days working 7 day jobs. You are going to burn out. And feel overwhelmed and exhausted. And you know what? That will lead you to the BEST decision of your life. Sometimes we have to hit rock bottom to see the light.

 

My darling Amanda.

You are the STRONGEST, most COURAGEOUS woman I know.

 

You may not know it now, but these struggles? They don't define you.

And while in the moment, they felt HARD and IMPOSSIBLE to get through.

You did. You made it through.

And almost 3 years later, it's led you to such a beautiful life.

 

A life with a marriage that is far from perfect but gives you SO much joy every single life.

A life by design that YOU have crafted that genuinely lifts you up.

A positive relationship with food, exercise and your body.

And through it all, you've developed the COURAGE to share your story & maybe, just maybe, the work you do will make a dent in the world.

Give women a safe space to grow into their best selves.

And THAT is something to celebrate.

Xo, your future self.

Why You Should Give A F*ck

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WOWZA ma peeps.

It's been a long whirlwind of a summer and honest? While I freaking LOVE sharing my heart with you guys, I just haven't had the time to properly pour into a blog post that would SERVE you. My energy has been reserved for my challengers in our Ditch the Diet Challenge, my coaching tribe, my acting gigs, theatre classes and time with my hubs!

BUT I'M BACK and have something major on my heart to share with you babes, so here goes.

At the beginning of September, I spent an amazing weekend at a leadership retreat in Michigan with the leaders in my coaching family.

We had photoshoots, did some MAJOR ASS goal setting, snuggled under the stars, had bonfires, ate delicious food and celebrated social media strangers turned best friends, business partners and family. 

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I’ve spent the past few weeks journaling and processing the entire experience and holy wow am I just filled with so much damn gratitude.

It’s been almost 2 years since I had my quarter life crisis and quit all of my soul sucking part time jobs to dive in and be a full time coach and actor. While it’s been quite the rollercoaster, it’s pretty freaking incredible to wake up and realize that I’m actually living my freaking dream.

Yep, even normal ass girls can make their dreams come true. I’m not special. I just decided to freaking go for it. (And if you’re ever curious to learn more about my story or what it’s like to be a coach on Team Inspire Joy, you can learn more here. I'd love to chat!)

In all the journaling I’ve been rocking out the past month, I got to thinking about some deep shit and you KNOW I can’t keep that to myself.

 

The main question?

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What do you give a fuck about? Like, really really care about.

If SELF CARE TIME isn't #1 on that list, then giiirl, it’s time to do some re-evaluating on your life.

Trust me -- I spent YEARS putting everyone and their mother above myself and was always in hustle mode and it did not end well. You know that quarter life crisis moment I mentioned earlier? Yup. Don’t make the mistakes I made.

And if you have and are at your breaking point,

THERE IS A WAY OUT AND UP.

 

So what does self care reeeeallly mean?

I’ve been on my own personal journey to self care and I’ve found that there are 3 main factors that have been HUGE in my development:

 

EAT LIKE YOU LOVE YOURSELF

Plain and simple: fuel your bod with whole foods. GET THE EFF OFF the yo yo diet train of death and eliminate processed foods and JUNK for once and for all.

You want to feel energized, strong, confident and empowered?!

So much of that starts with what you put in your body.

Not sure where to start? Grab your free copy of the Busy Babes Guide to Healthy Living and hop into our Live Your F*ck YES Life community -- join the convo and start showing your bod some LOVE.

 

MOVE YOUR BODY

Now I’m not going to tell you to do one kind of workout for the rest of your life or that you can’t feel strong & happy unless you’re rocking out cycling classes or getting ripped in a crossfit gym.

(Y’all know I’ve pretty much ditched the group fitness classes unless it’s my monthly yoga goodness anyways ‘cause let’s be honest, I save wayyyy more time and money by rocking my badass at home workouts)

But what I AM going to tell you is that you haaaave to move your body every single day.

Yup. every single freaking day.

My mantra? I will move my body to the pleasure of my soul.

Some months, that might mean rocking out a strength training program. Other months, it’s diving deep into my yoga practice. And sometimes, it’s just going for a long walk with my hubby and our pup, Toby.

Find your mantra or feel free to use mine if it resonates ;)

 

SLOW THE EFF DOWN

This one’s ESPECIALLY hard for all you type A perfectionists (raise yo hand, I see you girl). And one that I’ve had to PRACTICE.

I am reeeally good at the hustle mode. And while I appreciate it at moments in my life, there HAS to be a balance or else you just burn the eff out and before you know it, you’re crying on your bathroom floor, wondering how you got here. Yeppp, definitely been there.

 

Quick tips to find stillness in your day?

  • Take a 5 minute break from whatever you’re doing and step outside and just breathe in the fresh air

  • Stop everything you’re doing, grab a piece of paper and write down 5 things you’re grateful for.

  • Put the phone AWAY, grab a book and dive in.


Ok, now it’s YOUR TURN.

This week, I want you to focus on ONE of these 3 things.

Dig in, show up for yourself and start making those habits, lady love!

 

Want the accountability? Join our Live Your F*ck YES Life community!!

 

Sending you love & light,

Xo Amanda

The One Decision That Changed My Life (New Orleans Recap!)

A couple of weeks ago, I spent the weekend in New Orleans for our annual coach summit with my amazeballs tribe, Inspire Joy. This was my second time coming to this event and this time around, I really felt like I was HOME. I laughed, I cried, I learned, I was inspired but most of all, I was re-ignited.

So first up -- WHAT THE HELL IS SUMMIT ANYWAYS?

For almost 2 years, I’ve been a health and fitness coach with Team Beachbody, the company that makes the amazing at home programs like 21 Day Fix, PiYo, and Insanity. I run virtual accountability groups for women who want to ditch the diet and find joy in fitness, and I also mentor a team of almost 100 women who have decided to pay their passion of health & fitness forward and earn extra income by becoming coaches themselves.

The reason why I LOVE Beachbody is that it’s mission is focused on transformation from the inside out in every aspect of your life -- your mental/emotional/physical health, your finances, self confidence, mindset and so much more! The more I coach, the more I fall in love with it and am endlessly proud to be a part of such a beautiful, values driven and integrity based company!

I am also obsessed with my team, Inspire Joy. We’re a group of goofy, creative go getters who freaking LOVE quality time together, and we spend sooo much of the year working together virtually that trips like this are seriously AMAZEBALLS.

 

NOLA ADVENTURES

My flight was delayed THREE HOURS flying out of Chicago because of a silly rain storm (CAMAAAN) but luckily some of my team was also delayed so we got to hang together :) Once we finally got to the city, we drove to our Airbnb and got ready for TEAM TACO NIGHT! 

On Thursday, I got up with my gals Jess & Laura and we got our sweat on to our latest program we’re rocking out together and had a relaxing morning hanging out before heading to our first personal development event -- the Power of I Am! This event was amaaazing -- learned so much from incredible leaders & got to hear from Cara Alwill Leyba, the author of The Champagne Diet and Girl Code.

Afterwards, we got beignets at Cafe du Monde ('cause DUH) and later that night, we had our huge opening ceremony at the Superdome! 

Imagine being in a stadium surrounded by 20,000 of the most ambitous, positive, driven, self aware people you know. I get giddy just thinking about it again! IT WAS SERIOUSLY SO EMPOWERING.

Friday, I got up SUPER early for a live workout with the infamous Shaun T (yes he is just attractive in real life and MOTIVATIONAL AF) and holy balls, it was tough. I had had a really emotional night the night before -- continue reading to learn why -- so I neeeeded this sweat sesh so bad. #therapy for real. And it was so empowering to sweat alongside of so many people I admire and look up to. 

Then it was a full day of workshops followed by a super wonderful dinner in the French quarter and a night on the town on Bourbon street ;) We kept it classy but we DEF had fun haha. 

Saturday was our last full day -- filled with more sessions and we closed out the trip  with our huge Celebration at the Superdome. It’s like a giant broadway show meets the Oscars meets Cirque du Soleil. And you get to be there up close and personal. Freaking EPIC.

WHAT I LEARNED:

 

+ IT’S TIME I FREAKING BELIEVE IN MYSELF

Last year, when I came to summit, I had a DREAM. A VISION. A life filled with freedom, travel, purpose, goofy-ness and LIGHT. But it was just that : A dream. Something that felt so freaking far away. 

I mean, I had just started coaching 8 months prior, and was still working 7 different part time jobs, and while I had started to become a more positive and healthy version of myself, I still had a shiz ton of work to do on my self esteem and belief. 

And last year, I came on this trip dreaming of FREEDOM. Of having a tribe of MY gals by my side.

And this year? That dream turned into my reality and it's all because of these incredible women.

Because these gals believed in my dream too. 

They saw what I was doing and said to themselves "I wanna do that too" and they ACTED on it. 

They stepped up to their life to pursue THEIR dreams. To change THEIR lives. And in turn, they've completely transformed mine.

And seeing them there, it hit me like a ton of bricks -- I did what I set out to do. I made my dreams freaking happen. 

It’s so easy in the day to day to get soo wrapped up in what’s not going right or what’s hard that you forget to take in and be grateful for what IS working and this trip put everything in perspective for me :) After all, this journey is FAR from a race -- it's a marathon, and one that I'm IN for the long haul.

 

+ MY TRIBE IS MY FAMILY

Truth? I didn’t have a lot of girlfriends growing up. 

I never did the whole sorority thing, or really got along in big groups of gals because I just couldn’t handle the gossip and I always felt like I just didn’t fit in. 

I became a coach because I wanted to turn my passion for health and fitness into a side hustle that would give me the FREEDOM to follow my dreams and build a life by design.

What I didn’t realize is that I would be getting a FAMILY. These women inspire me every single day to be a better coach, leader, friend and above all, a better version of me. And it’s been the biggest surprise and the greatest gift along this journey.

When we were in NOLA, I found out that my dog Toby had been rushed to the ER. It was our first night, we had just gotten to our opening night celebration and I was feeling SO full of light, gratitude and giddy-ness and in a single text, all of that felt so far away. I had the first anxiety attack and sob fest I’ve had in a long time sitting on the cement floor of the back of the stadium with one of my coaches and in that moment, I realized how LUCKY I was. To have women in my life (some of which I was just meeting in person for the first time) who I didn’t have to say anything to -- they knew EXACTLY what to do and were supportive in the most incredible ways. Every single one of them was THERE for me. 

I believe that community is everything. 

It was the missing link in my life that I never knew I needed. And now that I have it, I can’t ever imagine going a day in my life without it. 

Every day, I am surrounded by other women JUST LIKE ME. 

Women who are dreamers and want to do MORE with their life. To extend BEYOND the status quo. And through it all, I've been able to RISE UP into my full potential and LIVE A LIFE ON PURPOSE. All because of them. 

 

+ HOW MUCH MY LIFE HAS CHANGED IN SUCH A SHORT AMOUNT OF TIME

As I sat in our sessions and speakers and team dinners and live workouts, I couldn’t help but think about how different things were for me just one year prior. In just 20 short months, my entire life has shifted.

Through coaching I have been able to:

  • break free of my binge eating disorder .
  • finally stay consistent with my own health and happiness a priority because it's MY JOB to be happy and healthy and fit
  • believe in my enoughness
  • pay off all my credit card debt and contribute to our finances aka PAY DEM BILLLSSSS! .
  •  inspire and empower other women to, bust through their emotional eating habits and rise up to the become the women they KNOW they were put on this earth to be
  • travel to new and amazing places
  • mentor other women just like me to be able to build a side hustle of their own too, and live life to the fullest.

Here is what I believe:

Community is everything. 

Your HEALTH is everything. 

 And if you aren’t waking up every day and saying FUCK YES my life feels AMAZEBALLS, then it’s time to shift course, girlfriend.

It's never too late to say YASSS to your dreams.

 

If there was one thing you could do right now to get a step closer to your dreams,

what would it be?

FOR ME?

IT'S RISE THE F*CK UP.

TIME TO STOP PLAYING SMALL AND START STEPPING INTO THE LEADER I KNOW I WAS PUT ON THIS EARTH TO BE.

Ready or not, world. Here I come.

Xo Amanda

p.s. If you want to learn more about joining our team, please reach out and send me a message. I'd love nothing more than to get to know you and tell you more about what we do! 

Top 5 Personal Development Books for Beginners

Let's face it.

We aren't born to be 100% confident, energetic, and instant masters at what we do.

 

We know we have to take care of our physical bodies by eating right, working out, getting sleep, etc etc but we don't really talk about how we need to take care of our mental and emotional selves.

The more you learn about yourself, the more you'll be able to understand your quirks, strengths, and capacity for dealing with life, and it's so important to work on our mindset every single day.

 

Have you ever felt like you're stuck, spinning your wheels, in a life rut?  

It's probably because you haven't been challenging yourself on the inside. If you don't put work into your emotional and spiritual growth, you're going to stay stuck.

 

Whenever you're going through change in life, whether that's losing weight, starting a new job or relationship, or moving to a new city, it's important to grow and evolve on the INSIDE. If we don't match our inner growth with our external growth, we're never going to feel satisfied with our accomplishments or like we're "good enough."

You can only go as far as you grow. Your success in life will always be limited by your confidence, skills, and level of self-awareness.

Personal development is heavily encouraged in the Beachbody world, but I think it's important for everyone, regardless of what you want out of life! 

Putting myself on a mental/emotional "diet" of personal development books and podcasts over the past year has helped me deal with my perfectionism, anxiety, and low self esteem. I'm still a work in progress but I've learned so much, and helping other women get to know themselves is now my purpose in life.

 

Today I'm sharing the five books I started out with that had the greatest impact on my life!

 Sidenote: Just because these are my personal recommendations doesn’t mean they’re the right books for you. I’m a 25 year old female who’s building her own business, working on her acting career, chasing her dreams, and working to overcome self doubt, anxiety and perfectionism. If you’re similar to me and, chances are you’ll benefit from these books too!

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Big Magic by Elizabeth Gilbert

Yup, the author of Eat Pray Love is at it again. And I think this is her piece de resistance, especially if you’re an artist or creative entrepreneur. In this book, she dives right into how to release your fear so that you can show up for yourself in your creative life.

What I learned from Big Magic:

That fear is a NORMAL part of the creative process. And that you can either let the fear stagnate you for moving forward OR you can choose to move forward in spite of the fear. To use it to propel you towards the artistic and creative path you crave.

Quotable quotes:

“ Do whatever bring you to life, then. Follow your own fascinations, obsessions, and compulsions. Trust them. Create whatever causes a revolution in your heart. The rest of it will take care of itself.” 

“You can measure your worth by your dedication to your path, not by your successes or failures.”

“What would you do if you knew that you could not fail?”

“Don’t let go of your courage the moment things stop being easy or rewarding. Because that moment? That’s the moment when interesting begins.”

  

You are a Badass by Jen Sincero

The title of this book says it all. If you’re looking for a book that will empower you with confidence and ultimate badassery, this book is for you.   

What I learned from You Are A Badass:

To not take yourself so goddamn seriously and that you CAN do whatever you put your mind to. Her tough love, no BS approach really hit home with me and made me realize that so often, I trick myself out of doing these really huge and exciting things because I let that inner mean girl (or as I like to call her, my inner shit talker) tell me I’m not good enough. Eff that. You are. End of story.

Quotable quotes:

“It’s just as easy to believe we’re awesome as it is to believe we’re giant sucking things”

“There will never be anyone exactly like you. You were given special gifts and talents to share with the world, and even though everybody has special gifts and talents, nobody will use theirs quite the same way you do. You have a way of being in the world and a perspective that’s unique to you. You are kind of a big deal.” 

“What if you had the audacity to leave your excuses and your shame about wanting to be huge and fabulous behind and really went for it full-on anyway? What if you decided to do the most outrageous, most exciting thing you ever dared fantasize about, regardless of what anyone, including your terrified self, thought? THAT would be living.”

  

The Slight Edge by Jeff Olson

Can you tell I favor female personal development authors? Sometimes you have to throw some masculine energy into the mix, and The Slight Edge is a MUST-READ for anyone.

This book is about how we can turn simple daily actions and behaviors into long-term success. It's all about starting where you are, with what you already know, and slowly but surely making baby steps towards your big shiny goals. In a world that tells us to expect instant results, it can be really discouraging and frustrating to work towards a big dream or goal that will take patience and time, and it’s easy to get derailed from our vision. I love this book because it reassures us that it’s not about big massive leaps...it’s about the little things we can do to keep us moving forward.

 What I learned from The Slight Edge

The Slight Edge taught me how to shift my own definition of “success” and gave me a lot of confidence.

 Quotable Quotes:

 “You already know how to do everything it would take to make you an outrageous success. All you have to do is keep doing the things that have gotten you this far.” 

“Successful people fail their way to the top.”

“Success is a process, not a destination. It’s something you experience gradually, over time.”

“Happiness isn’t some big thing you pursue, not something you chase after. It’s something you do.” 

“Don’t try to figure it all out. If you want twice the success, double your rate of failure. You start with a plan, then go through the process of continuous learning through both study and doing, adjusting all the time like a rocket ship on the way to the moon, of track 97 percent of the time.”

 

The Desire Map by Danielle LaPorte

The Desire Map is about leaning back and letting your values and core desired feelings take the lead. It’s about a creative, soulful approach to success and goal setting.

Whenever you start freaking yourself out or feeling overwhelmed and intimidated by your own plans and goals,the Desire Map is like a sigh of relief that will remind you you’re already good enough, and exactly where you need to be.

This book is half inspiration, and half workbook that will guide you to discover your own Core Desired Feelings, and then help you create a plan to manifest those feelings in all areas of life.

What I learned from The Desire Map:

That getting clear on how we want to FEEL in our life is essential for making decisions in our lives.

Quotable quotes:

“Wanting more for your future is not a betrayal of your present or past.”

 “Awareness is realizing that our life could always be better. Growth is doing what it takes to make it better.”

 “When you respect the darkness within yourself without any guilt trips, you’re becoming truly free.”

“Goals can perpetuate overplanning, and overplanning kills magic and possibilities.”

“You can ease up on yourself without shrinking your dreams.”

 

Mastering your Mean Girl by Melissa Ambrosini

Mastering your Mean Girl is a no BS kick in the pants read that will help you make a plan for creating your own version of a kick-ass life — one that’s “wildly wealthy, fabulously healthy, and bursting with love” and where your mean girl won’t dictate your life anymore. This is a must read if you’re ready to let go of your Mean Girl, take action and start living the life of your dreams.

 What I learned from Mastering Your Mean Girl:

How simple shifts in perspective can be so transformative on your mental health.

Quotable quotes:

“In order for you to be the best, happiest, shiniest version of yourself, you need to fill yourself up first so that you are overflowing and bursting with love.”

 “There are no mistakes, just opportunities for evolution. Choose to see every ‘mistake’ or ‘failure’ as an opportunity for growth.”

“I move because I love the way it makes me feel. Not because I hate my body and want to fix and change it.”

 

A few tips on using personal development

If you’re anything like me, you’ll be tempted to binge on personal development, but it’s important not to let your “all or nothing” mindset take over. 

A good goal that will keep you moving forward at a steady pace is to read one PD book a month

 

That will give you motivation to actually finish reading it, and you’ll also have enough time to absorb and process what you’re reading (We actually do this every single month in our free Live On Purpose Community so if you haven’t joined this badass high vibing tribe, what’re you waiting for? Hop on in and soak up the looove!)

 

Sometimes I check PD books out of the library, but I prefer to buy them because I treat them like a workbook. You want to be able to highlight, underline, scribble notes and breakthroughs in the margins, and constantly be asking yourself "how can I apply this?".

I also love going back and re-reading my favorite books, because you’ll get something new out of them as your life evolves and changes. It’s fun to go back and see my previous notes and take-aways, and how I’ve been able to implement them into my life (or not!)

 

I encourage you -- nay, I DARE you to try one.

One of these books is probably standing out to you right now so just listen to your heart and pick it up

 

xo Amanda